What You See and Believe is What You Get

As a psychologist, life-coach, and marriage counselor I learned many years ago that everyone has a “grid” through which they perceive the world.   When a couple has been experiencing conflict or their relationship has been wounded, it still can amaze me at times how different their descriptions are of what they believe happened.  I sometimes think, “Were both of these people actually present at the same event (or series of events)?”

Without getting too deep into the theory of “constructs” (look up Kelly – an early theorist of psychological thought for more info), I think it is essential to our relational, psychological, physical, and spiritual health for us to acknowledge our own individual biases.  I know, for example, that I am much more likely to enjoy being around a dog that a cat, partly because of my past experience and partly due to the fact that I am allergic to cat dander.  When we are blind to our own biases, preferences, or opinions, we can easily mistaken these subjective idiosyncrasies for fact – and they most definitely are not!

In the spiritual realm, concerning our relationship with our Creator, I have found that many of my clients project Mom’s, Dad’s, an older sibling’s, or some significant authority figure’s “face” onto God.  This can be rather comforting if you had a great role model growing up, but in cases where someone was abused or neglected as a child (particularly if they felt abandoned or judged), this common psychological process (over-generalization and projection) can be extremely harmful.

Some of my clients have even admitted they hate God or are very angry towards Him for what He allowed them to experience.  (While this isn’t the point of this essay, I do believe we must acknowledge that God cannot allow for free will and at the same time prevent people from hurting us.)

One of Satan’s greatest lies is that God doesn’t really love us or that He treats us unfairly.  If the Enemy thinks he can get us to believe this lie and thereby cause us to distance ourselves from God, you can pretty much assume he is already attempting to do so.  If, however, we consistently seek God and His truth, the Holy Spirit will help us to perceive the Truth and will grant us the faith we need to deal with life’s challenges even when God seems far away, uninvolved, unfair, or unloving.

In our present post-modern world where relativism and extremely tolerance is considered the politically correct norm, Christian beliefs can be viewed as narrow-minded or intolerant.  While Christians can be narrow-minded, judgmental, or just as biased toward people of other faiths and philosophies as anyone else, the Truth of the Gospel if often considered by non-Christians as just one possible (but not very plausible) explanation of the cosmos.  And those of us who believe that Christ was the Son of God who died for our sins and rose from the dead, may be considered stupid, delusional, or both.

Yet, here’s the thing, despite our finite minds and the forces of evil that promote untruth (or partial truth), Truth remains Truth.  There is an ultimate reality – God’s truth revealed in the Bible and through the Holy Spirit to all who place their trust in Jesus Christ.

What about you?  Are you agnostic or skeptical that the God of the Bible even exists?  Well, I too have been skeptical at times, but does life really make sense as just some random accident resulting in our existence?

What statistically are the odds that over eons of time, at the right second on the right planet in the right place in the right galaxy, the right chemicals would mix together at the right temperature, in the right amounts, in the right climate and geological environment, with just the right conditions to create and then sustain life?  Some people say that it takes more “faith” to believe that, than it does to accept the miracles recorded in the Bible!

James 1:5-6 says:  “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.  But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt…”

You see… what we believe or perceive – what we “see” – is truly to a great extent what we get.  God through Jesus Christ offers us real life with our loving Creator both now and throughout all eternity.  Do you know of any other philosophy, religion, relationship, or way of looking at life that can compare to that?

Jesus said, “I am the way, the truth, and the life, no one comes to the Father except through me.  If you have seen me, you have seen the Father and now know the Father who has sent me.”  (John 14:6-7)

May I ask you to look around at this life with an open mind – with eyes wide open?  Perhaps for the first time you will see the Truth – that God created you for eternal fellowship with Him.  Can you see God in the majesty of his creation or in the face of a little child?  If not, does your blindness to God’s existence then “un-create the Creator?

Jesus, God’s Son, is the Truth and His words are true.  He came into this world he had created to open the eyes of the blind.  If you are still in the dark – step into the Light of Christ and you will be born anew!  Seek the truth until you find it (or until He finds you), look at the world through eyes of faith, and your life will be forever changed!

Then the glory of God will appear – and what you see will be what you get!


About Bill Kuntz

Christian Life Coach and psychologist, husband to Wanda, dad to Kathy and Kristy, adopted son to God. I enjoy writing and blogging. My new passion is writing and speaking to inspire others to be all that God made them to be. I work with couples, families, and individuals (particularly young adults and adolescents) in my psychotherapy practice. As a life and leadership coach, I specialize in assisting pastors discern God's highest calling and to achieve high goals without sacrificing connections with family and friends. Please call if you or someone you care about needs counseling or coaching. My phone number is 314-647-4695.

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